Most of the
time we enter into relationships with some needs of our own. Some relations are
purely for material needs. We can put our business relations in this category.
Other relations we make are to fulfill some emotional needs of ours - the need for love,
care, and attachment.
Most of the
time when we make emotional relations, we are experiencing emptiness within.
And with the hope to fill that vacuum within, we search for someone in the
outside world. Now often, at that very stage of our life, another person too,
with the same kind of vacuum is attracted to us.
Now, these two
incomplete people meet with the hope of fulfilling themselves and making
themselves complete. But guess what??
The initial
charm of the relationship is like the full moon. it looks beautiful, glowing, and energetic. It instills romance in the people.
But after a
few days, the moon keeps on losing its glow and becomes smaller. On the day
when there is no moon, comes complete darkness. It is at this time that in such
a situation we cannot see anything in dark without an arrangement of some other
source of light.
In the same
way, the very fact that something new is happening in life gives thrill and
excitement to partners, but the moment that newness ends, they discover the
vacuum in each other. The more they
expect from the other partner, the more frustrated they become. And relation
does not survive or does not allow each other to grow.
If at this
stage, both people have their own guiding light, then they are able to work on
themselves and keep on adjusting to each other. And their relationship
stabilizes.
If both people
in this relationship were flowing with love at the beginning of the
relationship (instead of searching for love), then they are able to survive the
light and dark phases of the relationship in a better way. Love in them keeps on
growing.
So never try
to find someone who can give you love, especially when you feel a lack of it.
Always allow such a relation in your life, when you yourself are flowing with
love.
"To seek is to suffer. To seek nothing is bliss.” ― Bodhidharma
With love
Avdhoota